Men's Health

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Self-pleasuring Don’ts: 4 Things to Avoid at All Costs

As just about every man knows, one of the great things about a male organ is that it’s always there - and one of the other great things about it is that it’s almost always ready to play. So whenever a guy is excited or bored or just in the mood for a little fun, his member is usually game for a little self-pleasuring. (Hopefully a guy will exercise a modicum of restraint so that too much use doesn’t result in inadequate attention to manhood care, of course.) But over time, a guy can sometimes get a little bored with his regular self-pleasuring routines and want to spice things up a little. Again, nothing wrong with being adventurous, but there are some self-pleasuring activities that it’s usually wisest to avoid.

- Keep it to yourself. There are some situations where openly self-gratifying in front of other people is perfectly fine - such as when one goes to a self-pleasuring club or attends a circle jerk. But these situations are rare, and even though public self-pleasuring may seem exciting and may fulfill a person’s exhibitionistic streak, it’s best to refrain from doing so unless it’s a setting where it is explicitly allowed and/or encouraged - especially as in most cases public self-pleasuring is illegal.

- Avoid vacuum cleaner hoses. Often when a man has a tumescence, he really, really wants to find an object into which he can insert it. Sometimes this is fine - a pumpkin with a hole hollowed out in it, for example, or a sensual toy that provide the simulation of a female organ. Sometimes it is not - as in when a guy looks at his vacuum cleaner and wonders what it would be like to penetrate the hose - especially if the hose is turned on. Guys who try this are asking for trouble - and a lot of pain, as the hose will at minimum create pain and soreness. In some instances it can cause more serious damage, so it’s best to avoid the temptation altogether.

- Don’t use the tenderizer. Although self-pleasuring often euphemistically is referred to as "beating off," it would be more accurate to say that most of the time men tend to stroke or rub their member rather than beat it. However, sometimes men do bat the manhood around with their hand while self-stimulating. Within bounds, this is fine - but don’t move on to using other objects, such as a mallet or an actual meat tenderizer. The damage that can be done to the member can be severe and lasting.

- Be careful at work. Lots of men self-gratify at work (and indeed some people find that they are much more productive and less stressed if they self-stimulate at the office), so this tip isn’t saying DON’T do it - just be careful. When indulging, make sure that the space is appropriately safe. For instance, if a guy has his own office, he should be absolutely certain that the door is locked. If he doesn’t have his own office, he should be sure to use the men’s room and to make sure the stall door is fully closed. And in either case, he needs to keep his moans and sighs down to avoid an embarrassing situation.

If a guy can avoid stumbling blocks like those above, self-pleasuring can be a fun and enjoyable way to pass the time and to get in touch with his body. It’s even better if the manhood is kept in good shape by regular application of a top drawer male organ health creme (health professionals recommend Man 1 Man Oil, which is clinically proven mild and safe for skin). The best crème will contain both L-arginine and L-carnitine. The former is an amino acid which helps the body produce nitric oxide; this in turn keeps manhood blood vessels open when increased blood flow is needed for tumescences. The latter has neuroprotective properties to counteract rough use of the member that can otherwise lead to diminishment of male organ sensation.

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